Mother The World

The Orphan: The Pro-Life Missing Link

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Tue, 31 Aug 2010 03:05:00 +0000

It is a poverty to decide that a child must die so that you may live as you wish." Mother Teresa

About a year and a half ago, I was very excited to attend my first national pro-life conference. I was about to release my book “TO BE A MOTHER: ADOPTING GOD’S HEART.” It is a book that chronicles my experience into motherhood following the abortion I had when I was a teenager. I had originally intended to write a book solely on adoption until through much prayer and meditation I was sure the abortion story must also be told. I have since been blessed to have given birth to two children and blessed through the adoption of 4 additional children (one from Guatemala and 3 from Ethiopia). I was very excited to attend my first pro-life conference. I checked in and was given a lanyard to place around my neck with a name badge. I was given a giant plastic bag filled with literature of pro-life organizations. I couldn’t wait to sit down and browse through them. I truly soaked up this conference experience. I loved the people and learned so much about the ‘Life’ issues that were outlined during the weekend breakout sessions. They included the following topics:

Stem Cell Legislation

Eugenics

End of Life Care

Starting a Pro-Life Ministry at Your Church

Domestic Open Adoption

Pregnancy Support Clinics

Sidewalk Counseling

Counseling and Caring for the Post Abortive Woman

Medical Procedures for Late Term Abortion

Roe V. Wade decisions

Students for Life

Global Abortion Issues

How to Cope with Infertility

Blogging for Life

Talking to secular people about abortion….

The list went on and on. I was enjoying this conference but I found myself looking through the bag over and over for something. I emptied the bag and practically turned it inside out. Something was missing.

In between sessions, I walked from booth to booth, table to table and continued filling up my bag. I saw T-shirts. I bought T-shirts. I bought books. I signed my name on lists for newsletters. I enjoyed conversations with many people. I added contacts to my phone. Still, something was missing…

My book “To Be A Mother” was released a few months later. It became a number best selling Amazon adoption book. I started an organization to instill pride and understanding of issues pertaining to Mothers and children globally called MOTHER THE WORLD. I spent the year in what felt to me like two separate universes. I would give my abortion testimony at pro-life conferences. The following week I would talk to adoption conference attendees about adoption. This went back and forth. I kept asking myself “Why does it feel like something is missing? Why does God have me in these two seemingly separate circles?”

Three of my four adopted children are from Ethiopia. They are what some call AIDS orphans (although most of us who have adopted don’t call them orphans anymore). My children are orphaned because their parents died from AIDS. If they had never been adopted they would have either been on the streets to eventually get a disease and die at a young age or just die much earlier than most Americans due to poor health/environment. In a nutshell, their ‘lives’ would be shortened, meaningless and doomed.

My Guatemalan daughter was born in an area known for murdering girls as young as 5 after they are raped by gangs. The gangs do this to maintain control over the villages. They are terrorists. My daughter just turned 5.

My passion has grown so intensely for the orphan over the past 5 years. More specifically I am brought to tears at the thought of many of the 150million orphans who today are left to die. Children in many countries who are HIV+ will die due to lack of proper care. In America we rarely hear of AIDS babies anymore because medical advancements have made it so that babies born to HIV+ mothers can be born without the virus.

Also, children adopted with the virus if brought to America and given proper care will live a long full life. But still they are dying in many countries without anyone to even pray, hold vigil, protest or counsel the mother who has abandoned them at the orphanage steps. These children in some facilities in Eastern Europe are left to starve alongside children with cerebral palsy, cleft palates and down syndrome. Some abandoned children that have been given to the orphanages healthy will go insane due to lack of stimulation, eye contact or tactile touch. In some countries if children are not adopted or fostered by the time they are 7 they will be left in an orphanage to languish, starve or to be sold into trafficking.

One story that I heard recently was of a 7 year-old child in Eastern Europe who was living at an orphanage and asked a friend of mine if she could bring her books next time she visited the orphanage. The little girl wanted to learn how to read. The orphanage director looked at my friend and said ‘Don’t bother her life is meaningless.”

Some girls in India are murdered when born as second daughters due to an outlawed dowry system that still continue to this day. There is an Indian village called “The Village Where They Kill Their Daughters” because there are no girls. They are either aborted or killed shortly after birth. And we know of the little girls discarded and abandoned in China due to the population controls.

My girlfriend Carolyn from Project Hopeful tells me that children orphaned in Ethiopia with HIV will die faster if they don’t think they are going to be adopted. They lose hope and would rather die than live without a family.

There are still 150 million orphans globally. Very few will be adopted. Many are suffering as they starve, are in pain from their diseases or acutely lonely waiting for someone to say “you matter.” For most of them that means that they will die believing they did not matter to anyone.

So, in the past few weeks I have had a clarity that I have been praying for. I have had an epiphany of something so simple. I know so clearly what the missing link is. It is the orphan. When I mention this to my pro-life friends they usually nod in understanding that this is something so simple that they can’t even believe we missed it. Yes we talk about adoption at these conferences but we rarely discuss orphans internationally and how so connected it is to the sanctity of life issue. I don’t recall ever seeing a pro-life break out session titled “How to Practice Pure Religion by acknowledging the Vulnerable Orphan.” I haven’t seen any break out sessions even remotely close to that. Why has this issue been omitted? I believe that because the orphan is so close to God’s heart that somehow this has been so hidden right under the noses of the pro-life movement that we have lost our ability to smell and see what is so clearly evident. The unborn are so important. I know because I grieve the choice to abort my daughter everyday. The sick and elderly in America are also important. All of it is crucial. But that is just the point. It ALL is important. I can no longer attend another pro-life conference that is a broken chain. We can see these children, minister to them and give them life. How can we possibly consider ourselves pro-life when we ignore 150 million human beings whose lives are being disrespected?. How is it that we have avoided this topic in our breakout sessions?

I will say that on the other hand I am not totally comfortable at the avoidance of the abortion issue at adoption conferences either. There are 1.5 million unborn human beings killed in America every year and more globally. I consider them orphans defined in James 1:27 too.

Adoption doesn’t necessarily mean pro-life and pro-life doesn’t necessarily mean adoption advocacy. This fact really gets to me. I have met many Christian adoption advocates who believe in abortion. I have also met many pro-life individuals who have never ever even given a second thought to the 9 year old left to die in Russia due to the fact that no one has bothered to take him for a walk in 9 years. It is twisted to me!

Choose life! Respect life! Sanctity of Life! Chosen! Are these just cute t-shirts and bumper stickers to us? If we believe that we are created/woven by God, how can we discriminate based on age (whether an 8 week embryo or 80 year old alzheimers patient)? How can we omit the 150 million missing links in between that chain in pro-life conferences? As pro-lifers we have miraculously and thankfully remembered the unborn, the ones we can’t see. I am so grateful for that. But we are blinded to children that we can reach out and touch if we make a choice to offer life back to them through adoption, orphan advocacy or proper medical care.

I am making this observation and presenting it to the pro-life community because I believe in my heart of hearts that it is going to be received well. I would love to see a 40 days for the Orphan Campaign or a new pro-life fund started to support those who want to adopt HIV+ or down syndrome baby. But let’s remember that a chain with a missing link is not strong and will be broken.

Jesus wanted us to take care of the orphan. Jesus has been and is being stripped away from this world. To be blunt: there is a battle to abort Christ from the hearts of people everywhere. In many countries the orphan crisis is due to a lack of respect for life that has developed due to the fact that the message of loving the least of these is non-existent. Christianity is dead and dying in many countries. Christ is not welcome. Soon discarding children, disrespecting life becomes accepted as the norm. In America now we are killing people that we cannot see (the unborn, those in nursing homes, in hospitals). Today, in other countries children are left to die in plain sight on the side of the streets and in soiled cribs in government orphanages. If we think we are immune to this happening here in America then we are wrong. If we as a pro-life community don’t step up for the 150 million children that some call in-valid (invalids) then we are just being hypocritical. If we only advocate for the unborn and elderly, then aren’t we as bad as those who tell us that a human being only matters once they are through the birth canal? We cannot become guilty of discriminating against the missing link of living children that have been given life and then abused, discarded, ripped apart, raped and starved. We need to be consistent in respecting life…all life and the orphan is no exception.

My plea to both the pro-life and adoption community is to please fight from being habitual and predictable in your approach to your causes. For the adoption circles I ask that you stop trying to be careful in avoiding the abortion crisis. I ask that you become bold enough to focus on the truth that we are alive because He has knit us in our mother’s wombs. When mothers decide to abandon them they become orphans.

To the pro-life community I pray that we hold ourselves truly accountable. I pray that we don’t get so caught up in our typical routine of only praying at clinics and fighting against abortion legislation. All of this is important! But it is incomplete because the missing link is ignored….Those we call pro-choicers ignore and disrespect the unborn...if we ignore the orphan then we are choosing to invalidate their lives too..

I know some of you may think…”I can’t do everything. I have to decide on what I am standing for.” It is true we can’t do everything. But we don’t have to do just one thing either. And if we stand for one thing let’s stand for the lives of Human Beings of all ages. We can advocate for the unborn and the orphan. We can pray during 40 Days For Life, write a letter to the senator, and hold a fundraiser for an orphanage. I will stand in front of our clinics and pray and I will also be happy to advocate for a viable human being to be kept on life support. I will do this even though my passion leans heavily to advocating for the lives of the orphan who have remained totally invisible in some circles even though they are massive in number.

The next time I attend a pro-life conference I really hope there are brochures and literature advocating for children like mine and the ones still without families. I hope and pray that I can watch as my passionate pro-life friends take the plunge to “unorphan” one of these discarded children whose lives have been forgotten in places like Africa, China, Russia……I know that if I can get my hands on any of the bags given away at the next conference I will be filling it up with MOTHER THE WORLD brochures to encourage orphan awareness. I am starting to work on them tomorrow in anticipation that the pro-life community will no longer be comfortable holding conferences with a broken chain and missing link…MOTHER THE WORLD!

Pure Extravagant Religion!

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Sun, 29 Aug 2010 03:21:00 +0000

In 2000, I was blessed to be the contracted band for the wedding of Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones. It was an exciting time for me. I was in my element on the Plaza stage leading my band of 16 musicians, surrounded by A-list Hollywood cele

brities and honestly, I didn’t feel out of place. Granted, I didn’t feel like a movie star but I did feel confident in my abilities as a young band-leader. This was not a typical wedding. It had been reported that they spent 3.5 million on the wedding. And while most of my weddings were not 3.5 million dollar weddings most of them were in the 200-500k range and several a year were million+ dollar weddings. I had played the Plaza hundreds of times before thiswedding and on this night felt at home and at ease enjoying gazing at the movie stars on the dance floor and at their tables from where I was at center stage.

At one point during the night, I stepped back from my position in the front line of the band to hand the microphone to Art Garfunkel another to Jimmy Buffett, Steven Stills, Jimmy Webb, Bonnie Tyler and Mick Jones from Foreigner. I then sat down giving cues to the band while they performed. I remember being infinitely aware that this was probably the pinnacle of my success as a NY bandleader. I have done many parties for celebrities since then and before. But this wedding stood out. But as I sat on the stage, surrounded by Grammy and Oscar winners, a thought passed quickly through my brain. “NOW WHAT?” I was acutely aware that even though I enjoyed being there and loved my job, the level of fulfillment was only ‘so-so’. In the months after this wedding I started to become annoyed with people wasting 80k on flowers

that I would see thrown into a garbage bag or the dumpsters filled with filet, salmon and caviar. This also was just about the time that I started to feel pulled toward the orphan, adoption and other issues related to children and people struggling and suffering in America and around the world. I developed a really bad attitude about the spending that occurred at these weddings, parties. I would tell myself “there are children dying of Aids in Africa. All of that food could feed a village in Guatemala!” I became a bit undone….

But something changed a few years later as I started to indulge myself in thinking about the Extravagance of God. I am not going to suggest that we should be wasteful, but sometimes it really is okay to use the best wine all throughout the party. Jesus’ first miracle was turning water into wine at a wedding….(and really good ‘port’ wine apparently). My oldest daughter and I watch ‘SAY YES TO THE DRESS.” I am shocked at the 7000 dollar dresses. I hope my daughters know that the $7000 dress is probably not in their future, but there are times when it is appropriate to be extravagant with your children and throw a wedding or party to celebrate their life. I pray we can be extravagant in our love to each other like Jesus is to us. Sometimes this will come in the form of extravagant food, clothing or parties… but mostly I hope our actions can become invaluable treasures and contributions to the world.

When we decided to adopt our children we had to make a conscious decision to sacrifice our lifestyle, our prior way of existing in order to pour out our hearts and souls to these children. Most people I know who have adopted children are not rich but it is as if they have consciously made a decision to ‘bank on God’. In other words, they are playing the ‘God market’ not the ‘stock market’. If we believe that the center of God’s call to us is to serve and take care of orphans and widows (James 1:27), then are we also willing to invest in the church of PURE EXTRAVAGANT RELIGION? God calls this type of service to orphans and widows and diminishing the world’s influence on our lives- PURE RELIGION. Do we have more faith in our worldly pension plans and new 30k cars and big houses than we do with taking a leap of faith to pour all we are and all we have onto the feet of Jesus’ call?

I love the story of Mary (the prostitute) who poured out the most expensive oils onto Jesus’ feet. She took her life savings in the form of oil to anoint the feet of Christ and fill the environment, the house, the community with fragrance. Extravagant love really means pouring it into God in a gesture of faith without boundaries.

John 12:1-11 Jesus arrived in Bethany where Lazarus lived. The home that they were in didn’t belong to Lazarus though, it was, according to Mark 14:3, “Simon the Lepers” home. Most of us would never ever think of eating in a lepers house. And many of us would never consider adopting an HIV+ child or allowing the HEP C child to play or wrestle with our kids in our living room. But Jesus went there to eat. Jesus would play with the HIV+ kid, He would give His love extravagantly back to the down syndrome baby and the child crying at the side of the road. Jesus gave His life extravagantly. It was a good time at Simon the Leper’s house. It was also a place where something miraculous and truly great took place.  Mary enters the room and brings Jesus a God honoring offering. She approaches Him, breaks open her alabaster jar, and pours it all over his head. She then falls to her knees and pours what is left on his feet and wipes it with her hair.  The fragrance of the perfume fills the room as tension fills the air.  Judas rebukes her.  But the Lord Jesus is just as quick to honor her. Jesus blessed her gift and made sure that her selfless act would be remembered forever. Jesus visits the home of the Leper, dines and then allows a prostitute to pour out the oil she bought from selling her body in sin to men onto His feet. This boggles my mind. Jesus enjoys when sinful people extravagantly honor Him in serving Him, in glorifying Him. Mark 14:9, “I tell you the truth, wherever the gospel is preached throughout the world, what she has done will also be told, in memory of her.”  

So a few months after the famous Plaza wedding I stood at another wedding at the Plaza. The father of the bride told me that they almost lost their daughter to cancer when she was a child. They popped the most expensive champagne for her wedding. The father gave a toast in celebration of his daughter being given life when they were sure she would die. I watched on realizing that an expensive wedding was appropriate…I still wondered and was frustrated at what seemed like wasteful spending at other events and then I realized that each one of us is precious….

Today my (neice in law-that means my brother in law’s niece-) was laid to rest. She was 10. Her name was Giovanna. She died of cancer. I think about how blessed she was to have extravagant love poured onto her as a child surrounded by loving parents and family. I know that had she lived to see her wedding we all would have wanted to pour the expensive champagne.

I think about Gio and I then think about all of the children in the world who do not have one person to lay vigil as they die. I think about all of the children who will never have a champagne toast in their honor because they have no mother or father to shower them with love.
I think specifically about a little boy named Baxter in Eastern Europe who is HIV+ who may never have a chance to learn how to read or ride a bike because no one was extravagant enough to ‘bank on God’ and pour extravagant love onto him…I cringe and am brought to tears in thinking that he could die without one person laying vigil at the side of his bed. And I think about how he has a ‘disease’ that if treated is totally manageable…if only someone was willing to be extravagant enough to bank on God and pour their savings on him (like Mary did to Jesus).

Today I was at a birthday party where two adopted children were pampered and surrounded with love. I think about my little girl and my friend’s daughter and I can understand how their lives are worth well more than extravagant love..the kind of love that would fill a room with expensive flowers on their wedding days. I remember how my girlfriend and I prayed for these children and how it seemed risky to ‘invest’ in these children who were qualified and considered by some to be ‘unplanned’ and ‘unwanted’.’ But in ‘banking on God’ with them the incredible thing is that we are the ones that feel like we are soaking in some kind of expensive oil of Christ’s love.

What is more risky? To commit to abiding by Pure Extravagant Religion by ‘banking on God’ or sitting comfortably while the ‘world’ or ‘wall street’ brokers control our life savings….? Shouldn’t we want to be saving lives rather than committing our lives to saving?

When the groom comes back to His bride (the church) after being gone for awhile, and asks, “So how are my children? Have you been making sure that you are caring for them?” What are we going to be able to say?

I hope we can turn to the One and say….”Beloved I poured out everything we have on these children because you told me that in order to honor you I had to take care of them and not be influenced and polluted by the world…so I took all we have saved, every flower from our garden I have bathed them in, every rich fruit I have fed them with and with the most expensive linens I have clothed them with…….and I am amazed to see that new flowers are growing, new fruit is budding and I have filled your closet with the finest silk and velvet from gifts that have been laid at our doorstep…”

What do we believe in ?

There are 147 million orphans…many are dying today. Some of these children do not have one person to care enough to even pray for them. Some are left to starve naked because they are handicapped and have no one to even bring them a banana. Christ wants us to clothe them, feed them and open our homes to them (Matthew 25:31-46).

I remember being on the fence with not knowing whether we should throw an investment onto our children via adoption. I remember being afraid but I know now that I am not going to ever regret the choice we have made to ‘bank on God’. I will never regret pouring what we had saved onto the feet of God’s call to ‘go’ and adopt these children. I know that had I been a goat standing in front of God as someone who failed to recognize the face of Jesus in the eyes of these children I would have wished I had taken the step to join in participating in “Pure Extravagant Religion” while I was still able to.

My children may never get the 1 million dollar wedding. But I no longer judge or criticize the work I do. I realize that there are times that as parents we should pour into our children in celebrating their lives extravagantly. It just grieves me knowing that each life deserves celebrating but for 147 million orphans that rarely means a birthday party. It grieves me to realize that each birthday deserves the special party with tea and dress up and gifts, but so many children have no one to say “we are so glad you were born!”

Get out the good oil….pour it into God’s bank…live your life extravagantly for Him. Believe in Him and be able to look Him in the eye and say “we recognized you when you were a stranger, an angel unaware in the form of the orphan child .We took you in and poured out the finest scented oil on you….then we celebrated Your life and lived and practiced Pure Extravagant Religion for the rest of our days!” And it is a pleasure to be where we are surrounded by the pleasure of Jesus.

My Ugly Friends

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Fri, 27 Aug 2010 04:10:00 +0000

It was a long ugly year. It was also one that I will never forget. I learned so much about ugliness this year and discovered pure amazing beauty as well . I learned that when we step out to reveal our own ugliness, we disarm pretense, we create a safe house in our presence for others and we find that there is liberty in expressing truth and ugliness. It is sort of like washing off the thick make up we had been wearing for weeks on end just to go ‘au natural’ with a clean and freshly washed face. Each wrinkle, sunspot, pimple, mole, in the light of day is beautiful in its authenticity. Kicking off the three inch heels we have worn to give us stature only to run barefoot, feeling the sand, mud, water, in-between our toes, shows us how alive we really are when we walk in humility. Exactly a year ago I released my book, “TO BE A MOTHER.” I was reluctant at first to tell my story about the abortion I experienced and the deep pain, regret, shame, guilt and remorse that I felt. But through prayer it was clearly revealed that this story of God’s grace and redemption must be told. The day before the book was released it dawned on me how naked I would be and how ugly the truth was in my past. I was so afraid and doubtful but knew it was God’s will for it to be written in all of its naked ugly truth. The best lesson I have learned this year is that God loves me as ugly as I can be and as ugly as I have been. I have stood in front of women (whether it is one woman or a crowd of women) in my ‘ugliness’ and reminded them that they are loved and of value because God tells us that we are significant in our imperfection and ugliness. We try so hard to keep the make up applied, the high heels on and the pencil skirts pressed. But sometimes our quest for beauty just makes us feel dirtier and uglier by worldly standards, when we refuse to let the scars be shown. Sometimes the most beautiful parts of us are our scars, moles and age spots that we try to hide.

I expressed my ugliness to a Mexican woman walking into her abortion and gave my testimony for the first time ever in bad Spanish. She ended up keeping her baby. She smiled and waved to me as she left the clinic. I felt beautiful even though I was wearing sweats and a baseball cap.

I told a crowd of women of the ugly day that I wanted to kill myself post abortion. Later, after the event, a woman volunteered to help me carry my things to the car. She confessed her own abortion. I was the first person she had told in 27 years. She cried. We laughed in liberation in the empty parking lot outside of a conference center. We both saw how free she felt once she confessed. It was a beautiful day even though it was cold and rainy .

This summer I was present when a baby was born that had been close to being aborted. I had shared my ugly story with the mother. She shared many ugly stories of her life to me. We both saw Jesus in the face of this child and felt beautiful even though we both hadn't slept in 48 hours.

I was present when a friend of mine had a nervous breakdown in front of my eyes. I don’t believe she would have been able to express her ugliness had she not known of mine. I watched later as she pulled herself out of it and developed an acceptance of her own ugliness. We found beauty in Christ’s grace that day….

I am a different woman now. I have been transformed through ugliness this year. I am so grateful to Jesus for moving the mountains inside of me to make me comfortable enough sometimes to sit in the ugly valley and know that I can make it up to the mountain top to view His beauty too. The ugly valley in all of its ugliness is sometimes where He wants us to be in order to show others HIS true beauty.

I thank God for surrounding me with women comfortable with the ugliness of this world. I thank God for friends like Carolyn, Traci, Leslie, Cindy, Diana who will pick up an ‘ugly’ HIV + child and open their arms and homes to them only to see God in their eyes.

I am grateful for my new friend Teresa who will go into orphanages in the Ukraine and hold and hug an ‘ugly’ child left to starve to death because he has cerebral palsy.

I thank God for Lynette, Sundy, Deborah who will shine a spotlight on the ugliness of human trafficking.

I praise God for Denice and Pam who are relentless in their passion to save the ‘ugly’ unborn babies.

I thank God for Rebecca and Madonna who hold their 'ugly’ down syndrome babies and love them unconditionally.

I thank God for Jodi who is willing to go to ugly places like Haiti and Uganda or advocate for the orphan in DC revealing the ugly truth about an at times flawed process...

Thank you Jesus for Eileen who with her relentless Kolfe Mama attitude unorphaned Solomon who is sure to breathe new life into America representing all of the 'ugly' street kids and discarded children in Ethiopia.

Thank you God for Elaine who has never met a teenager or young adult that she didn’t want to put her arms around and call ‘child.’ There are too many young adults who never know the comfort of a mother. I have to believe the world is a better place because she faced her own ugliness and was able to embrace their’s with joy and acceptance.

I am not the same as I was a year ago. The ugly truth has been a direct and fast path to witness unbelievable beauty that was unavailable to me when I tried to cover up my spiritual blemishes. My friends are beautiful with dirty fingernails that have dug into the messes of this world. I feel so much more put together these days as I walk with these ‘dirty fingernailed’ women. We dig deep, searching to find, as Mother Teresa put it “Jesus in disguise,” in the orphan, trafficked, post abortive and so called flawed children of God with their ugly diseases, birth defects and so far from ‘Gerber baby’ demographic faces. The women I call my friends these days are not the ‘pretty women’ type by worldly standards either. But I believe it is fine with us because our quest is not to fulfill an image of acceptance from the world. We are ‘ruined’ for the world and may never be perceived as beautiful to anyone looking at us with expensive designer rose colored glasses. My friends and their children are beautiful even if the world calls them ‘ugly’ sometimes…WHO THE STINK CARES!!!!! We are alive and more beautiful walking with mud in our toes, dirty fingernails and our messy, imperfect children. Such an honor to dance next to girlfriends like mine with their muddy feet and scars exposed for all of the 'pretty perfect people' to see….

Thank you Jesus for beautiful friends bold enough to run, walk, stumble and fall in a very ugly world!!!!!

Keep Changing the World!

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Wed, 28 Jul 2010 19:26:00 +0000

TWO DROPLETS SAVED...DIVINE MERCY PREVAILS...

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 02:11:00 +0000

It has been an incredible month. First we took our kids to Chicago to spend time with the Twietmeyers and the Batemans. This was a month with a focus on special needs adoption. To be more specific with a concentration on all of the HIV+ orphans that need homes, down syndrome babies languishing in places like the UKRAINE and the many older orphans who are 'aged out' of the foster care system in the US at 18. In chatting with the many parents involved in adoption this month, I have been inspired to commit to a bolder approach with MOTHER THE WORLD in encouraging others to adopt one of the 147 million orphans....So we returned from our Chicago trip on Monday last week. I drove with all of the kids. Then three days after the Chicago trip I drove to New Jersey to the Divine Mercy conference in NJ. Pretty amazing trip. I went up there on Friday. Friday night, Deacon Vincent Ricciardi treated us to the most incredibly catered NJ

Italian style get together. ON Saturday, the morning of the conference I was a little cranky. I couldn't quite put my finger on why. Yes, I was a little tired but there was something deeper. I think the weight and enormity of three special needs orphans in Eastern Europe was just getting to me. I was feeling desperate. First there was MONROE..the cute little boy who if not adopted by October would have been placed in an orphanage unadoptable left to languish in a crib the rest of his life...

There was Marat the 12 year old boy who is HIV+ also in Eastern Europe who if not adopted will be placed out onto the streets also to eventually die due to lack of care...

And then there is Baxter the gorgeous little boy who is also HIV+ in Eastern Europe who needs a family and who reminds me of one of my kids and has the same last name as my stepfather. I dream about bringing him to our family but instead commit to finding a family for him unless finances and circumstances would allow for our family to adopt him.

So, on Saturday I was consumed with pain and heartache for them. My mothers heart was grieved. I arrived at the Divine Mercy Conference and was privileged to listen to the stories of Mercy and encouragement of Christ's mercy. When it came my time to sing and speak near the end of the day I gave my testimony and a plea for the group to remember the orphaned children and consider adoption and advocacy for them. Still when I left the conference I was worried about Monroe and as I usually feel....overwhelmed with the enormity of the orphans suffering.

It was an amazing conference but still I worried about Monroe, Marat, Baxter. I kept seeing a vision of drowning orphans in a sea as Christians stand on the shore drinking expensive coffee with their ears plugged to the cries in the water. I also prayed in the car on the 10 hour drive home and said "God why oh why does it feel like we are spitting in the wind and that our desperation for the least of these falls on deaf ears?" This was not a response to the Divine Mercy attendees because this group was committed to extending mercy. It instead was a general feeling of angst and frustration ...

I prayed and prayed and praised in the car. I imagined that the Lord Jesus was trying to pour out His Mercy on to us to extend to others but we were holding a fan out and the Holy water was not hitting us..I called out for us to be consumed in His mercy and prayed for us to understand HIS heart...I was frustrated....I said "Dear God, let your heart be our heart. Dear God let your call and desire be so thick on us that it becomes a part of our DNA. Let your heart be transplanted into ours..." Then something incredible happened..I saw two miracles within hours of my arrival home from the DIVINE MERCY conference. One was that MONROE had found a family and will not die in a crib in the Ukraine but instead will have a family, love, physical therapy, an education...( I told my kids that we can take his picture down from the refrigerator and we can choose another child to pray for while continuing to pray for a smooth adoption process for his family)..

Then Carol called. Carol is the pregnant woman who has been living with us for 3 months. I met Carol when she was 12 weeks pregnant and considering abortion. We committed to helping her keep the baby. At 1 am as I was still driving home...Carol called from the hospital to tell me she was in labor and that they would be inducing her to speed up the labor...I told her I would sleep for a few hours and then come to the hospital. I made it home, slept for 4 hours and then got up, showered, went to the wrong hospital first and then went to Carol's hospital at about 7:30..At 8:30 they discovered she was 8 cm...at 9 she was 9 cm...well at 10:14 with me holding her hand she delivered a gorgeous baby girl named Demetria Juliana ....Today i have been diapering a newborn that had a scheduled abortion months prior and I tended to a single mother..and on Tuesday we will have the baby in our guest room to stay with us until God moves them to another place..

Yesterday, I was frustrated about the coffee drinking deaf Christian's standing on the shore as 147 million orphans drown. Today I watched as two babies were pulled out from the undercurrent of near death experiences....I am reminded that I may not always see God's mercy acted out. But His droplets, message and Holiness is sticking and penetrating into the hearts of a few of those otherwise preoccupied children of God pouring water into coffee pots on the shore....And I know that MERCY is contagious...Monroe's story will inspire others to adopt children like Marat and Baxter, Carol's story hopefully will save one of the 4000 children drowning in the wake of abortion every day....And as painful as it is for those of us that are determined to activate the mercy message even when we perceive or sense that we are spitting in the wind...we have to believe that the waters of truth are somehow making it to the shores to interrupt and wake up those content to read their papers and sit on couches while the suffering drown...some of them do put their papers down and run into the ocean to save the one that they can reach....MAY GOD'S MERCY AND TRUTH CONVICT AND WARM THE SOULS OF HIS CHILDREN TO DIVE INTO THE WATERS AND MAY THE HOLY SPIRIT FIRE BURN THEM TO THE POINT WHERE A CUP OF COFFEE won't be what they live for anymore....

Do It Yourself Laundry Detergent

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 18:47:00 +0000

Okay i am so excited. I am going to share this recipe for home made laundry detergent which I believe originally came from the Duggars but I got it from my really good friend Carolyn Twietmeyer the wonderful mother of many amazing kids from birth and adoption....I have been noticing that detergent has been priced around 12-15 for a large bottle and because we go through so much I have
been opting for the extremely cheap laundry detergent but this is saving me tons of money. I think for the recipe below I probably spent 2-3 dollars......it will fill up 8 bottles ....

Ingredients:
4 cups hot tap water
1 Fels-Naptha soap bar ... See More
1 cup washing soda
½ cup Borax
Grate bar of soap and add to saucepan with water. Stir continually over medium-low heat until soap dissolves and is melted.
Fill a five-gallon bucket half full of hot tap water. Add melted soap, washing soda and Borax. Stir well until all powder is dissolved. Fill bucket to top with more hot water. Stir, cover and let sit overnight to thicken.
Stir and fill a used, clean, laundry soap dispenser half full with soap and then fill rest of way with water. Shake before each use. (It will gel.)
Optional: You can add 10-15 drops of essential oil per two gallons. Add once soap has cooled. Ideas: lavender, rosemary, tea tree oil.
Yield: Liquid soap recipe makes 10 gallons. Top-load machine: 5/8 cup per load (approximately 180 loads). Front-load machine: ¼ cup per load (approx. 640 loads).

Kids first trip to Cemetery!

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 03:05:00 +0000

I know this is sort of creepy...but the kids were so funny with their first visit to the cemetery. I love how kids can be so real even in otherwise somber places...

Spiritual Adoption: Kolfe Mama and Solomon Reunited

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 02:51:00 +0000

Amazing miracle in the lives of the Mestas family as their son Solomon who they have spiritually adopted is now here in America from the Kolfe Orphanage in Ethiopia now here on an education visa to study to be a pastor. I am once again showing the video I shot of Eileen about 7 months ago along with two videos from our time yesterday at the airport....to greet Solomon into America...

FOSTER KIDS/VIDEOS

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Sat, 12 Jun 2010 01:19:00 +0000

TLC's Chilli talks about her ABORTION

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Fri, 04 Jun 2010 02:00:00 +0000

So awesome when people in entertainment come out to discuss the negative aspects of abortion. So many people in the entertainment industry advocate abortions...Incredible! She was very brave to talk about this!11

The Story of Esther: Explained by 5 Year Old-Matea

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Sun, 23 May 2010 02:12:00 +0000

Is it me or is Matea brilliant...?

The GREAT Church!!!!!?????

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Thu, 13 May 2010 03:22:00 +0000

I have been pondering my life a lot lately. I have been realizing how much time I spend chasing after greatness. I am not chasing after greatness in the sense of being a celebrity stalker or believing I should solicit dinner invites to the White House. But I have spent a fair amount of my life working on ‘being great.’ I have been told often how great I am. Because of loving the way it feels to be told I am great I then would chase after greatness even with a greater fervor. When I was little I loved getting praises and adulation when I would do something simple like ride a bike. Then I became a great poet at a young age. Then I was this great softball pitcher. Then I was great at community theater, singing, dancing and singing at the same time. As I grew up I aspired to be the best New York City bandleader and ended up being that. I longed to be a great mother. My husband and I had great credit scores and a great nest egg because we had great jobs. In being entertainers you often hear “Great Job!” “You were great tonight!” “Great Voice!” “Great band!”

Well human greatness is a fallacy. I tried really hard at the age of 18 when I found myself pregnant to continue to appear "GREAT." So I had an abortion..Greatness doesn't really exist for most humans. We should aspire for excellence while knowing we are human. Most people that many of us consider great are not. And many of our friends or relatives are also on the ‘greatness gravy train” and can’t get off. They spend their days trying to appear to be great when in reality they are far from it. I think as Christians we can have very large egos. In fact, we even pride ourselves on being the most humble which is ironic to me. We preach on humility and service but then when not on stage looking ‘great’ totally drop the ball. I will tell you what prompted this post on greatness…

Today I was in a church. The church has been called a ‘great’ church. The building is modern. The staff is dressed really hip. There is coffee and give away mugs in the lobby. The ladies bathroom is painted perfectly great for the women with great conferences listed on the bulletin boards. The hallways are filled with international goals in ministry. The church hosts concerts by well-known Christian artists. From the worldly viewpoint it looks like the church is doing ‘great’ work for the kingdom. One of the great works it is advertising was the race to raise funds for breast cancer. All of us believe fighting breast cancer is a great cause. But I happened to know that Susan G. Komen has been known to give money back to Planned Parenthood an organization that advocates and promotes abortion. I also have heard of many studies linking breast cancer and early induced abortions. Women like myself who have had abortions experience a 40% increase of risk of breast cancer. So, for me when I see a sign in a church and banners promoting this organization that is giving funds back to abortion providers, well it is just hypocritical and is just salt in the wound. Think of it this way: How would you feel if your church was promoting a race to stop lung cancer and you knew the money was going back to Philip Morris an organization that creates cigarettes. Then how would you feel if you lost a family member to lung cancer and the church continues to pour money into that organization that advertises and promotes giving cigarettes to children, teens and women. In early Roman history, babies were left on the side of the road to just die and it was the Christians that would save them. But what if there were chariot races that were all the rage just racing by babies and yet all of the Christians found these chariot races to be a vehicle for them to raise money for the people who would own a field to allow the babies to die in (sort of a death field).

I was upset that this church had these banners up. I believe there are better ways to raise money to fight breast cancer and I for one wouldn’t want to place my money into something that was going to cause the very thing I was fighting against. Would God want us to be that kind of steward to our money? So, I decided I would have a confidential conversation with the pastor. I asked in the morning. The receptionist said they were in a staff meeting. So I asked if it was okay if I came back in the afternoon. I told her it was a personal matter. I didn’t feel like telling everyone the story and facts over and over. When I arrived in the afternoon I was visibly upset by this. It would appear that even though I have been through therapy, bible studies and healing-churches that avoid and dodge the abortion issue still really gets to me. I said “Can I see the pastor for 5 minutes?” I had just seen him walk in with his lunch. I do respect the time of the pastors but this was an exceptional case and plus I believe Jesus came to get rid of overly stringent rules. I said “Please!” There were tears in my eyes. Well the receptionist would not relent and even closed the door on me. This is what got me on the greatness kick. Here is this ‘great’ church with women in cute pink sweat suits and sneakers unaware of promoting abortion and potentially more breast cancer, and a pastor who won’t ‘minister’ unless the crisis happens when it is perfectly timed.

Maybe if the church wouldn’t be so concerned with having perfectly great schedules in great buildings they would actually be in God’s business of saving lives and not APPEARING to be doing mission work. Wearing pink stuff for a walk can appear very Christian and ‘great’ until you google things like “Susan G. Komen and Planned Parenthood.” Or “Abortion Breast Cancer!” This church isn’t alone. There are many that honestly don’t care about abortion even though the bible tells us that He formed us in our mother’s womb. I just thought this "great' church was different but apparently not....

My credit score is no longer great. I spent lots of money traveling to Ethiopia and Guatemala to adopt kids. I don’t think I am the NY bandleader rock star that I once was because I have been spending time talking about motherhood and not focusing on booking the band. Our work situation is not ‘great’. My mortgage is in pieces and far from ‘great.’ I probably will never be famously ‘great’ again. But I am tired of qualifying for some certificate of ‘greatness’ that has never come.

Jesus is great. Jesus is greatness! He acknowledged people hurting and had an open door policy. He hated hippocrites. Jesus says we are all adopted by Him. Jesus talks about the sanctity of life and walked a rough path with a cross after being beaten bloodied. There was nothing , cute or hip about a donkey with a mocked Jesus on the path….He would have been mocked a fool in these days too. But He truly was great!!! We should all get off of the ‘I want to be fabulously great treadmill.” We are not ‘great.’ We are sinful and flawed humans. But our intense passion for greatness and perfection has created some awful and evil stuff (such as potentially financing abortion by getting involved in a trendy event.) I am going to try to be more aware of how many times in my days, in my life I try to appear more than I am. I want to be more aware of how often I take credit for something ‘great’ in my life that is a miracle from God….

I came home today sad…defeated because when you dive into God’s plans you really start to see how not ‘great’ you are…..but then I went online and was introduced to David Platt who has given me hope that the GEN Y’s will reclaim true Christianity…I hope that my kids can live the radically Christian life which has nothing to do with our quest for ‘greatness’ but everything to do with JESUS’…

MOTHER'S DAY GIFTS-Tshirts from Mother The World

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Mon, 03 May 2010 01:52:00 +0000

To become an official MOTHER THE WORLD Sponsor donate $20 or more and get this MOTHER THE WORLD Tshirt for free as a THANK YOU(a great gift for Mother's Day)...Also, there is a link to additional gifts for mom at the end of this post...I am seen here with Elaine Bateman MRS. KENTUCKY in our MOTHER THE WORLD T-shirts

If interested in more Tshirts feel free to buy these from our link below. These are additional purchases outside of the promotion listed above...

Kids sing NATIONAL ANTHEM in Broken English

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Wed, 28 Apr 2010 13:43:00 +0000

Ella came home from school so proud of learning the National Anthem. Because English is not her first language and she is still learning she has a ways to go before July 4th but should have it down by then..

Living Water for Girls-Keep your kids safe and away from Traffickers

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Wed, 28 Apr 2010 12:05:00 +0000

Don't let your kids go to the mall. Lisa Williams is my new friend and the director of this organization....

Grandpa Jones: Happy Birthday!!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Thu, 22 Apr 2010 01:42:00 +0000

Grandpa Jones: Happy Birthday!!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Thu, 22 Apr 2010 01:42:00 +0000

#Adoption VIDEO/First view of Picture of Mom in 5 Years

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Tue, 20 Apr 2010 13:20:00 +0000

(this pic is of YEMI AND BAN with Grandma Atalay, KIBRU (kids brother sitting), Yidneckachew (in white /red standing behind KIBRU and UNCLE(standing next to Ban)

It has been a beautiful day for us. Tonight we had the pleasure of showing our kids a picture of their mother. When we adopted them in 2008 they were not given a picture of their mom. They had been in the orphanage at Layla House in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia for 18 months before we adopted them. Prior to that they had spent at least a year trying to live between their Grandma's house and great grandfather. So, it has been about 5 years since they have laid eyes on her face. About a year and a half ago, my friend Carla took a trip to Addis and was so sweet in desiring to take a long trek to try to get a picture. THis would entail driving to Asela (a few hours away) and finding the great grandfather's house and then trying to convince him to take them to see grandma. Well, we had also given Carla a photo album with many pictures of the kids in it. She handed the photo album to the great grandfather and his friend who identified herself as our kids AUNT....she also took video. But she was unable to go to get the pictures. At the time I was at least happy that we were able to get a photo album to grandma Atalay (great grandpa's daughter). When my kids saw the video they adamantly said "THAT IS NOT MY AUNT..THAT IS GRANDPA'S HELPER!!!" Well we have discovered now that HELPER translated into modern english means MISTRESS...So, we had the HELPER's phone number. Last month our friends YEMI AND BAN (also known affectionately by our kids as family to us) went to Ethiopia. We did not tell our kids but the plan was for them to try to get a picture of mom. They called the HELPER'S phone number and she said she would try to find grandma and the teenage brothers (there is also an uncle who is quite young and very bright). But days went by and she never called. Well, when we had visited in 2008 we had a cell phone number that was given to us during our visit by Getish (Yemi's brother in law). THe young uncle and MARK (who had the phone) exchanged numbers. Well a miracle had happened and a few days after the HELPER (forgot to deliver a message)...the UNCLE called Getish remembering he had the phone number. Getish then said YOU MUST COME TO ADDIS NOW!! And he asked him to bring grandma and Kibru and Yidnekachew, my kids biological big brothers. And Getish said he would pay the travel fees (by bus) if they brought a picture of MOM (Bayoush).

Well they came...and they were elated because they thought we took off with the kids with no desire ever to make contact. The grandmother had been concerned that the kids were dead. She had suffered so much loss/death in her life...so cried with delight in Yemi and Ban telling them all about their lives here and telling the story of how we brought pictures last year. Well Great Grandpa and HELPER had never bothered to tell her or give her the pictures. Grandma now has some pictures of our kids and we now have the correct phone numbers, and mailing address within ethiopia to call to deliver things.

So, last night we had dinner with Yemi and Ban...we still did NOT tell the kids about the pictures. After dinner we had Ban sit down and show the picture to them. At first Ella was unsure of who she was, Grace knew immediately and with pride said I LOOK JUST LIKE HER...I had made oodles of copies because I knew they would want them....Then Andrew is so brilliant and wanted to make sure that I had a picture ready of the only photo I have of Matea with her birth mom ALMA....

So, this was a very sweet and early MOTHERS DAY...we are elated,,,we are relieved. We had spent two years wondering if we would ever have a picture of their mom....When I look into Bayoush's eyes I am in awe. I am saddened. I am thrilled and I am also comforted. I really felt that somehow, in ways that are unknown to me, we had connected with eachother. She will always have a special place in our lives. I have told my kids that LOVE expands like a balloon that never pops...and I want them to feel free to show their love to her, to ALMA (Matea's mom), to all of their grandmothers, aunts, uncles, brothers. It just shows them how vast and extreme God's love is for them. There is no abandonment. There is only an outpouring of God's continuing love for them in the large family that God has adopted for them and for us. It is incredible to see.

The kids placed her picture in their rooms and I know that they slept easier last night knowing that they don't have to worry anymore that they will forget what BAYOUSH looked like. And grandma can also sleep well knowing that she made a wise decision in extending the family of her grandkids. And we are comforted knowing that the boys are thriving and taking care of grandma and that we now have real phone numbers and real addresses...to make contact with.

AND as a woman who has grown up being photographed by a genetically inclined familial love for photos....I have learned that pictures are powerful and can bring so much peace and joy to a situation. I love the pics..I will continue to take many and VIDEO...and I PRAISE GOD!! for hearing the prayers of our hearts in bringing this one inch photos to us (that we have very boldly enlarged a million times)...

Bayoush: The Face behind the Name

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Wed, 14 Apr 2010 02:02:00 +0000

Well we are so thrilled to finally be in possession of a picture of our kids mom Bayoush. I just said to Mark as we were staring at her two pictures tonight..."It is sacred, sad and satisfying to have these pictures."

Just to update those of you who don't know. We have three Ethiopian children who were orphaned by the death of their parents from AIDS. When we came to Ethiopia to get them they had been in the orphanage for over two years. And there were no pictures of their mother anywhere. Once they were home the younger kids would cry saying "I can't remember her face!' One day we went to a restaurant, I watched as Grace my now 11 year old stared almost pale faced at the hostess. Later she said "Mom, that is what she looked like!" I said "who?" She said "my mom"..I said "oh honey she was beautiful" Grace said "yes she was"...she did not take her eyes off of the hostess that day.

My friend Carla went to Ethiopia and was so generous. She volunteered to go all of the way to Asela (at least two hours out of Addis) to search for the Grandmother. The plan was for her to visit the great grandfather who would then take her to the Grandmother who would have the pictures. BUt when she went to see the Great Grandfather she gave then the photo album we had made of the kids and then because of time/distance they couldn't visit the grandmother. Carla made a video of the grandfather and the so called AUNT and the kids very annoyingly said "that is not my aunt. we no like that lady"...it was a mistress to the grandfather.

So, my friends Ban and Yemi had finally been given their US citizenship after being in America from Ethiopia for 15 years. This last month they visited their very large and extended family in Addis. We had one phone number of the 'mistress' and a plan. We wanted to find out where my kids teen age brothers were, contact info and pictures of Bayoush. Ban called the lady who promised she would deliver the message to the boys who never called him back. Then Getish (Bans brother in law) remembered something. He said "when Mark and Deanna were here they used our cell phone during the entire visit. The uncle (he is about 18) has called me. I kept his number." So, Getish calls the Uncle and then tells them that if they come into Addis via bus and bring both boys and pics of Bayoush we will pay for their trip. Well they were thrilled because from their perspecive they had NO info on the kids at all. Our pictures which were sent and letters had never made it to them. So, now they came all the way to Addis were given updates of the kids (the pictures we sent didn't upload unto Bans computer) and were able to deliver the pictures....We plan on printing pictures and writing letters to send to them when my friend Carolyn visits in two weeks.

We are not posting the pictures yet. The kids don't know. We want to tell them with Ban and Yemi in the room because we want all of their questions to be answered. All I can say is there is a part of me that is so at peace right now. We do promise to post the pics later. But right now I just stare at the pics seeing all three of my kids in one face...and wondering why did she have to die? Why do I get to mother them? How can we stop the deaths from AIDS in Ethiopia so more women can actually LIVE even with HIV...? My heart is so connected to this woman that I never met. This family loved these children so much and we feel so blessed to have this extended family..Ban said that Grandma cried during the entire meeting. What an incredible woman. I can't wait to get pictures to her. To write to them and to be able to have a phone number to call them if and when we visit....amazing...

She is beautiful really really beautiful!!!

Hope International MICRO LOANS

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Mon, 12 Apr 2010 01:44:00 +0000

FREESET Tshirts in India....

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Sun, 11 Apr 2010 22:41:00 +0000

Mother the World is launching a PARTY WITH A PURPOSE (think AVON meets Compassion International)...In a nutshell, we will be focusing on such hands off topics like trafficking, hiv, street kids, domestic violence and of course the massive orphan crisis...all in a cul de sac party....we are researching FAIR TRADE products ...it will be a while to develop and we'll start with our current tshirts etc...but man we were so excited to see this company FREESET....

Mother the World: Can't or Won't?????

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Sun, 11 Apr 2010 02:56:00 +0000

I just spent an awesome day on Friday in Atlanta with Carolyn Twietmeyer and Traci Heim from Project Hopeful and Anna Belle Illien and her staff from Illien adoptions. We basically are finding strength in brainstorming in numbers even when we all had to establish a hand raising system because we tend to interrupt at times (guilty guilty and guilty again…said I)…Anyhow, somewhere early on when Traci and I were gabbing and not caring when we would interrupt eachother I said something that was so dead on to my passion in my MOTHER THE WORLD mission. I have trouble being concise. I can write books that need to be edited down because of too many words ..having enough material has never been a problem…being concise and having an ‘elevator pitch’ has always been a struggle.

So there I was with another MOTHER of the World (Traci) and I said it like this and I had to fight stopping dead in my tracks and holding back tears as it came out. I said “ I have a passion to honor the women who CAN”T mother their children by inspiring the women who WON’T mother to take action.” Please know the context of the statement. We were talking about the huge orphan crisis and how to bring the number of orphans hope and love. Do you remember being reprimanded as a child by the dour school teacher who would look up from their glasses and say “you can’t or won’t?” Some people literally can’t …others just Won’t…because they have been insulated and determined never to look at the fostering situation in America, domestic abuse, HIV, Child trafficking, cultural abuse.

Women who CAN’T in America:
1. Women who are infertile and desire to parent
2. People who can’t due to serious mental or physical disablilities
3. Those addicted to alcohol or drugs

Women who WON’T in America:
1. The women who get pregnant but abort
2. People who believe adoption is not their calling so do nothing
3. People who have no interest in the orphan crisis
4. People who would like to do something but never have due to not being introduced to proper options or ways to take action…

There is a distinct difference though in the mothers that I was talking about when making that statement because I was thinking of the mother of my Ethiopian children. She died and couldn’t mother….

Women who CAN’T in impoverished countries:
1. Women who know they will die due to diseases like AIDS, MALARIA, TB..they know the last possible act of love for their children is to make a life decision for them. Some relinquish them at orphanages due to knowing their pending death is coming.

Imagine desiring to MOTHER with all of your heart and yet knowing you “CAN’T’ because you will soon die because the AIDS MEDS are not coming your way. Or you never even knew about them. All you have known is that women die and there are babies and children without mothers….so, you make a decision for your children out of love….

I will never forget the day in 2007 when I prayed to God to USE me to be the answer to the prayers of a mother somewhere on the planet who could no longer MOTHER because of her pending death…I cried to God to allow me to be her angel and come. Every time I look into the eyes of my 3 Ethiopian children, I see her. Her name was Bayoush. I imagine she was beautiful even though we have no picture. She was young when she died….I think of her often. She is a huge motivation in my starting MOTHER THE WORLD…

My quote or new elevator pitch: “ I have a passion to honor the women who CAN”T mother their children by inspiring the women who WON’T mother to take action.” There are people who won’t do anything and I believe they just need to be educated properly on what they can do…so we need to find them and get to them.

In case you haven’t caught on yet “mother’ is a verb that applies to taking action to love, give, nurture, care for…it doesn’t require giving birth..it can take place in adopting, advocating and volunteering..It does always mean though honoring and respecting life from conception to natural death.

My motivation for MOTHER THE WORLD also comes from once being a woman who was one of the ones who “wouldn’t” mother. The underlying inspiration of MOTHER THE WORLD is really from my own wound from NOT mothering and saying NO to mothering in having an abortion as a teen. I was one of the women who I now say are the ones I am determined to inspire to take action. So, here I am now healed and with a deeper understanding of who I am and of what it means to ‘adopt God’s heart.’ These days the women who CAN’T haunt me …because there are too many of them. And although it is a blessing that I get to honor God by serving them in mothering their children, something is still not right.

One of the things we talked about in this little ‘consortium’ as Anna Belle Illien called us all, was in helping women with HIV/AIDs to live longer lives in places like Ethiopia, India, Guyana by investing in them and offering them hope …obviously offering ways for them to get their meds but also in finding ways for them to have longevity, to dream for a future where they can be the ones to see their kids graduate, get married.

What can the women here who WON’T do? Well I think with the right motivation they will turn into women who WILL make a huge impact in changing the planet by changing the lives of many. First, it would be great to see more people adopt and we are planning on ways to offer education and information to dispel the fears of adoption to many. But it also would be great to have more resources to offer life and sustainability abroad for women like BAYOUSH…imagine if she would have had the right meds and the right resources through micro-financing, business opportunities, education…We can help the women here who WON’T or haven’t taken action to participate in making major changes in the lives of women they will never see. So, I am praying everyone stays tuned as in the next several months we come up with ways to hopefully create options in a world that currently offers so little to the women internationally who CAN’T but would love to MOTHER their children into old age. And if you know of women who WON’T …well we also believe we have ways to inspire and transform them into active humanitarians even without ever leaving their cul de sacs…my plan is to allow them to MOTHER THE WORLD without missing their kids soccer games…but if they are really bold they can travel way outside of their subdivisions and come to some exotic places with us if they’d like to…

So my new elevator pitch is once again this: “ I have a passion to honor the women who CAN”T mother their children by inspiring the women who WON’T mother to take action.”

Mother the World: Can’t or Won’t?

Children Accused of WITCH CRAFT in Nigeria

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 13:31:00 +0000

This is not Christianity but rather a perfect example of how local tribal belief seeps its way into indigenous churches that claim Christianity but create their own rules based on satanic teachings as well from generational cultural practices. Jesus abhors this and cherishes children. Please pray for them..

God's Heart..ADOPTION VIDEO

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 02:07:00 +0000

Orphans: A House is not a Home

noreply@blogger.com (Mother The World) — Mon, 22 Mar 2010 02:45:00 +0000

“a house is not a home
When there's no one there to hold you tight
And no one there you can kiss goodnight”

I have 4 children who were once orphaned. My youngest Matea is now five but born in Guatemala. My other three “orphaned” children are from Ethiopia and have been here since 2008.

Last night I went out for a meeting with our church small group. My baby sitter was my friend Elsa Mugyenzi. She is Ugandan and also an orphan. She is now an adult and was one of the original members of the African Children’s Choir. So, Elsa was in my house with the ‘for sale’ sign outside with my 4 adopted ‘orphans’ along with my other kids, inside.

My husband and I love old classic music. One song we love is “A House is Not A Home”…it is a lush beautiful song with a great lyric that talks about a house not being a home when the person (or people) you love are not there. I have been thinking so much about this lately when pondering the possibility of our moving to another house and having to sell this one ( a house built specifically with my ‘orphaned’ children in mind). On the one hand I have noticed a certain entitlement attitude within myself that is not really all that attractive. I seem to think that God would want my kids to be in a mansion because of all of the strife they have experienced. I feel as if they have earned this and we have earned it in stepping out to parent them. On the other hand I have been made aware through friends like Elsa and from my own personal travels that in places like Africa that two dozen orphans can live in a 300 sf shack with one single ‘mother’ who has adopted all of them. Orphans live quite frequently in this world without a house and quite frankly ‘without a home.” 147 million orphans have lost at least one parent. Approx 20 million have lost both. Others have parents but are abandoned by them with no house and certainly without a ‘home.’ God loves the orphans but the world leaves them HOMELESS (even in America). God calls to His people to practice pure religion and take care of orphans and widows. Still, most are living like paupers.

In my neighborhood and most neighborhoods in my town there are many houses of 2000, 3000, 4000 sf with just two people living in them. There are houses with women and men ‘longing’ to be parents but grieving their inability to conceive. I respect their grief and remember longing to conceive prior to birthing the two I have birthed. But there are also children sleeping on the street crying and praying for parents, shelter, a blanket, running water or a bite to eat. There are many rooms in my town that could be filled with these street orphans or the orphans like my kids orphanage friends still praying for parents to come to give them a “HOME”. So, what is my point?

When I think of the journey my kids have taken in their short lives it boggles my mind. Matea is 5. She has been with us since she was 8 months. She was birthed in a hut in Peten, Guatemala..at 9 days old she took a trek on some mode of transport with her teenage birth mom to Guatemala City (several hours away) to be relinquished to a foster mom in a small house in Guatemala City…six weeks later that foster mother had been found to be unfit and Matea was put into the arms of an amazing foster mother named Elena for the next 7 months. She lived in a 2 room house with 4 kids ranging from the ages of 5 to 15 and two foster parents. Then one day at 8 months embarked onto a plane to America with us where we lived together in a 3600 sf home with 2 other kids and 2 parents. Then in 2008 we moved to the 6700 sf home we are in now….

Jared, Grace, and Ella lived in several houses prior to entering their first orphanage. They were born in Asela, Ethiopia in houses with mud floors. They bounced between their grandmother, great grandfather’s and mother’s house. They lived in Addis Ababa later with their mother near death. They then moved back to Asela…They talk about the time of sleeping in hay bails in the barn or by the chickens. Then after their mom died they were separated from eachother lived in grandma’s and great grandfather’s home. Eventually, they were put into an orphanage together and then another…and eventually they were brought to our house in America after we traveled to Ethiopia to get them ….to live in quite frankly …a mansion…(mcmansion).

What is a home? A house is not a home…this we really believe. My kids don’t mourn the loss of the orphanage, their grandfather’s hut, or even their mother’s house. But they grieve the loss of family or the HOME that they lost when their mother and father died.

Elsa Mugyenzi and I talked about our house. Elsa has a room in our house that she calls her own when she baby sits. We feel very homey in my house. Elsa mentioned that God wants to house all the orphans in homes and they deserve big houses. But most don’t live like royalty. Some will only know the street until they too pass away from diseases or sicknesses…Some of the sicknesses will be chronic ear infections, diarrhea or the flu…diseases/sicknesses that are treatable by simple meds. Even HIV can be controlled offering a long life for kids without a house..if given a HOME…..

What do orphans need? They don’t need big houses. They can live in apartments. They can live in rooms that they share with other kids. They can even live with grandparents. My kids sleep on floors when we travel to friends or relatives and don’t complain. They dream and are content. Orphans don’t need houses they need homes. They need people who have square footage and empty rooms to be willing to be bold enough to step into the desolate huts and sheds that house the orphans who cry out for Mama and never hear “I’m coming!” They need people willing to travel into their dangerous world in order to offer hope and a future that they pray for everyday. They need bold people willing to sacrifice their houses and worldy stuff to create a home for a wanting and needing child. People in America constantly talk to me about wanting to adopt but not having enough money, or a big enough house …but the truth is that those of us who have walked this walk have witnessed numerous times how God has provided the funds for adoption. Yes, many of us struggle at times through loss of jobs etc…but it is all relative. Our downsizing or our troubles in America often dwarf the extent of stress our kids have seen by the time they reach age 5 if they are lucky enough to have survived.

The word of God tells us to go and take care of orphans and underprivileged. In Matthew 25 Jesus equates taking care to those who lack as being the equivalent as welcoming Him. He also shuns and turns away those who did not take care of them saying:

Matthew 25: 41"Then he will say to those on his left, 'Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. 42For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, 43I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.'

44"They also will answer, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?'

45"He will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.'

These are really bold and scary words. But Jesus takes the business of taking care of those in need seriously. We may not all be called to adopt, but we are called to take care of the least of these.

Please remember the children like Kidist who wrote to me to help her find a family telling me she prays every day for a family. There are children who are beautiful and still in orphanages simply because no one has been bold enough to adopt an ‘older child.’ Children in Ethiopia and in America like Kidist eventually ‘age out’ and are put out on the streets after never having a mother a father or any parenting that will prepare them to take care of themselves. Please consider sharing a room in your house or encouraging a friend called to adopt to take the leap!!!!!

“Now and then I call your name
And suddenly your face appears
But it's just a crazy game
When it ends, it ends in tears”

A house is not a home when there’s no one there to kiss goodnight!!!!